Change Yourself --- Really !!!

"You can not satisfy each and every person in your life at the same time. Decide who is important to you and how much importance do you want to give to his/her thoughts."

I am saying above lines in the context of problem arising for a person due to his/her social group. Today when we have to work in teams, have to be a "good" social human being, it becomes very important what others think for us because on that our reputation, image, synchronisation with others depends.

Many people get worried if others think negatively for them. They try to change their way of doing things and if that does not work then they try to change themselves. But problem becomes more complex when that also does not work. But do we really need to change ourselves just because what others think of us. Can one change himself/herself according to what every other person think about him/her.

I don't think so. Every person is different from every other person and so is their perception and thinking. If anything is right for someone that does not mean it will be right for someone else also. If one perceives things from one angle that does not mean other person will also perceive things from same angle.

Same is the case with people. If someone thinks that the person is good that does not means that the other person will also think same. It all depends on how a person evaluates other person depending on his perceptions, values, environment, experiences etc.Therefore you can not satisfy each and every person at the same time in your life. So changing your behaviour or yourself will make one group happy but another group will become unhappy.

But does that means you should not change yourself even if you are wrong and you are becoming problem to people. No!

It only means that don't change yourself according to what everyone thinks. If you think that the other person does not think that you are right and you should change yourself, then decide -

• how much important that person is for you
• how much important is his/her thoughts for you
• is you behavior causing problem to your near and dear ones
• is changing your behaviour will really improve you.

if the person is very important for you and you don't want to cause any trouble to him/her because of your behaviour then change yourself. If many people are dissatisfied with you then may be something is really wrong and change yourself. And think before changing yourself that will this change really improve you or its just like switching from one mode to another mode to satisfy another section of people. Also, if you are changing yourself then that change should be real, not cosmetic or temporary.

So decide whether there is really a need for change in you. But while taking any decision give a thought to this also -

"Do not choose for others what you don't want for yourself."

It means, change or don't change yourself, but do not behave with others in the way you don't want to behave with you. If you are behaving in the way you don't want they should behave with you then change yourself NOW!!!